It is good to be home! We arrived late on Wednesday afternoon after spending a couple of days with dear friends in South Carolina. The days of travel and visiting served as a sort of decompression time for us.
We tried to sneak quietly into town, not having the energy for anything but getting into our own little safe haven of quiet and solitude. We had a close call when we stopped for milk and bread when someone from our community spotted us, but we were able to slip away with just a wave and a "Good to be back". We piled the few groceries on my lap (the car was packed to the roof) and drove the last 8 miles in eager anticipation of sleeping in our own bed.
Arriving home at dinner time with no interest in putting a meal together wasn't the best of plans. So we called Jack and Mary, who had been tending to our plants and feeding the birds, to join us at local Italian place for a chat and a good meal. Later, at our urging, they came home with us to sit on the back porch and sip wine. Simple, casual, and heavenly to enjoy the company of good friends, gentle breezes and the cry of the whip-poor-will. It is truly good to be home.
The following day, after unpacking the car, unpacking the bags and doing the laundry we felt it was time to venture off to see our friends. We enjoyed visiting with the staff at the Sales Center and then we headed to our new Club Peachtree, the huge amenities center that opened in our absence. Everywhere we went we got big hugs and warm greetings. It is so uplifting to have so many friends around us.
We spent a couple of hours being oriented to the responsibilities of working the front desk at Club Peachtree. Tom and I are jobsharing that part time position. Many of our co-workers have been covering our hours while we were away. We are so grateful for that. I am certain that we will be able to return the favor as others plan time away and need coverage.
On Friday night we treated the friends who looked after our house and sorted our mail to dinner at the Golf Club. It was like being at a wedding reception with all the table hopping to say hello. We knew most of the people in the restaurant, though so many people have moved here in the past two months that it is a wonder we knew anyone.
Yesterday was our first big social event at Club Peachtree. The Lifestyle Committee had planned an Memorial Day Barbecue and pool party (though the rain forced us indoors). I jumped right in and offered to help take tickets. Tom covered the front desk for a bit so the person on duty could come eat. Seems like we are already back in the groove.
Today I am joining a group of women for an outing to the local little theater for a production of Steel Magnolias. I loved the movie, but this will be far more interesting seeing it interpreted by Southern Belles for an audience of (mostly) the same. I am looking forward to a good time.
It is good to be home.
Sunday, May 24, 2009
Sunday, May 17, 2009
Gypsy Wagon
Just a quick note to say that we are on the road toward home. We left Albany late this morning with mixed emotions; the sadness of saying goodbye to family and the eager anticipation of getting back to a regular routine. Our car is stuffed with all necessities and accumulations that a 6 week trek affords. We truly look like a Gypsy Wagon.
Tonight we are spending the night just south of Richmond, Virginia. We are heading for Florence, SC where we will spend a couple of days with dear friends. It will be good to see them and it will be good to really relax for a bit. We should be arriving back in Griffin on Thursday.
We are looking forward to seeing all our friends and neighbors in Sun City Peachtree!
Tonight we are spending the night just south of Richmond, Virginia. We are heading for Florence, SC where we will spend a couple of days with dear friends. It will be good to see them and it will be good to really relax for a bit. We should be arriving back in Griffin on Thursday.
We are looking forward to seeing all our friends and neighbors in Sun City Peachtree!
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
Rx: Rest and Recreation
It is spring in Vermont. When we left NY a few days ago spring had firmly taken hold. Now, in the northwest part of Vermont, we are witnessing the bloom of spring all over again. Daffodils are gone but tulips are robust. Lilacs are swelling with fat buds. Some leaves are just beginning to unfurl and others are in full show. Everywhere you look you see green, green, green, punctuated by colorful spring blooms.
The weather has been glorious; sunny and gradually warming day by day. The sky is brilliant blue with white puffs of clouds. Just the way it should be. The wandering country lanes seem as comfortable as an old shoe to us. We have traveled this way many times in the past when we camped with the kids. Good memories.
We have always enjoyed the serenity and solitude of the Green Mountains and this trip is like a cup of warm cocoa on a chilly day; soothing and satisfying at the same time. The streams here run fast and cold, still burgeoning with the run off of the winter snows. We saw frosty white patches tenaciously clinging to the high peaks at Smugglers Notch despite the warmth of the mid-day sun. Dogwood blooms and gently nodding trilliums became evident as we descended through the mountain pass. It is hard to believe that a cold front will pass through tomorrow bringing soaking rains and colder temperatures.
We are staying at the Green Mountain Inn in Stowe. It is a cozy inn with historic roots and classic New England decor. The restaurant at the inn serves tasty, creative dishes. The tavern features a fine selection of beers and wines. I don't think we are going to mind if it rains all day tomorrow. I am so glad Tom and I decided to make this side trip. It is just what the doctor ordered.
I am not usually the one with the camera, but I did manage to take a few photos in the past few days. If you would like to see a few click here:
The weather has been glorious; sunny and gradually warming day by day. The sky is brilliant blue with white puffs of clouds. Just the way it should be. The wandering country lanes seem as comfortable as an old shoe to us. We have traveled this way many times in the past when we camped with the kids. Good memories.
We have always enjoyed the serenity and solitude of the Green Mountains and this trip is like a cup of warm cocoa on a chilly day; soothing and satisfying at the same time. The streams here run fast and cold, still burgeoning with the run off of the winter snows. We saw frosty white patches tenaciously clinging to the high peaks at Smugglers Notch despite the warmth of the mid-day sun. Dogwood blooms and gently nodding trilliums became evident as we descended through the mountain pass. It is hard to believe that a cold front will pass through tomorrow bringing soaking rains and colder temperatures.
We are staying at the Green Mountain Inn in Stowe. It is a cozy inn with historic roots and classic New England decor. The restaurant at the inn serves tasty, creative dishes. The tavern features a fine selection of beers and wines. I don't think we are going to mind if it rains all day tomorrow. I am so glad Tom and I decided to make this side trip. It is just what the doctor ordered.
I am not usually the one with the camera, but I did manage to take a few photos in the past few days. If you would like to see a few click here:
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Saturday, May 9, 2009
Frazzled
It has been quite a while since I last posted here. There are a couple of reasons for that. Once we moved in with Erin, Dan and the kids, time changed. Even though work and school left us with some empty hours(read no specific tasks pending) we still seemed to be constantly on the go. We went from pushing pills to picking up kids with lots in between.
Understand that in a retired person's world there is little chaos. What must be dealt with can always be put off till another day. The spontaneity of a last minute dinner invitation or lunch out with the girls is what comprises the rhythm of our life. In the world of two working parents with young children that rhythm is only a dream of "someday".
And so we throw ourselves wholeheartedly into the soup of life we knew thirty-some years ago. We have not forgotten the chaos of raising a family, but the way we approach things now is with a softer eye and a slower pace. Nothing is so critical that is worth fighting with a 4 year old over. The need to put your feet up at the end of the day is far surpassed by the need to snuggle and read a bazillion books before bed. The only legitimate complaint we have is that we just wear out too soon. I think the term frazzled is an apt description. Not much brainpower left over to write a blog, you understand.
Kelly is doing well; kind of in a holding pattern to allow time to perform it's magic. We have not been able to contribute much on that front this past week other than pick up Cowboy from doggie daycare and take him to the dog park (which is also a pretty neat kid park) to tire him out so his puppy enthusiasm is a little toned down when he gets home. We have conveniently dropped by, bringing lunch to Kelly a couple of days and, in so doing, have stolen a few moments of serenity as we so enjoy watching the lake from the deck. The kitty, who enjoyed the status of being an "only pet" while in Boston, now has to share the spotlight with the dog so we don't see much of her on our visits.
I have been putting in face time at Audiologic Solutions, Erin's office. Most of you know that I work for her practice, doing patient outreach from our home in Georgia. I usually put in a mere 12 hours a week. Not so while I am on site. I have put in a couple of 10 hour days, as well as some others of more normal length. It is good for me to actually be in the office to see how things run and contribute what I can. The rest of the staff is gracious about answering my constant questions and showing me where things are kept. The work isn't hard, but the stress of feeling like I have just been thrown into the ocean (I don't swim well) has contributed to my discombobulation. The satisfaction of stretching my mind and knowing my contribution is appreciated is rewarding though.
Tom and I have decided we need to get away for a little R & R, so we have decided to take a few days for ourselves. We thoroughly enjoy a good road trip, letting serendipity determine the way. We will generally head in the direction of Vermont because we find it very restful. There will be plenty of photo ops to satisfy Tom and small town quaintness to feed my inner soul. We won't make reservations, though, so we are free to follow the sun in whatever direction we choose. And if it rains on our parade we can always find a charming B&B to provide us with a cozy place to read or make art or just reflect on the past 6 weeks. I think a few days alone together will be heaven.
Next Saturday, May 16th, Kelly will be graduating from Rensselaer Polytechnic Institure (RPI) with her MBA. Considering the obstacles she has had to face throughout the last 18 months, we will all be doing a major victory dance on her behalf when she walks across that stage. We are so proud of her, and are delighted to be here for the big event.
If things continue to go well, we will begin our trek back home to Georgia a day or 2 after graduation. I am not sure if we are anxious enough to get home that a power drive is in order, or if a meandering route taking several days to complete will be the best way to travel. Just knowing that we will be back soon is a soothing balm.
Tomorrow we will all celebrate Mother's Day by going out to brunch. I am so looking forward to all of us being together. It doesn't matter if the weather is cooperative or not!
Happy Mother's Day to all of you. I hope that you will be celebrating in whatever way is most meaningful to you. Remember......you are never done being a mother!
Understand that in a retired person's world there is little chaos. What must be dealt with can always be put off till another day. The spontaneity of a last minute dinner invitation or lunch out with the girls is what comprises the rhythm of our life. In the world of two working parents with young children that rhythm is only a dream of "someday".
And so we throw ourselves wholeheartedly into the soup of life we knew thirty-some years ago. We have not forgotten the chaos of raising a family, but the way we approach things now is with a softer eye and a slower pace. Nothing is so critical that is worth fighting with a 4 year old over. The need to put your feet up at the end of the day is far surpassed by the need to snuggle and read a bazillion books before bed. The only legitimate complaint we have is that we just wear out too soon. I think the term frazzled is an apt description. Not much brainpower left over to write a blog, you understand.
Kelly is doing well; kind of in a holding pattern to allow time to perform it's magic. We have not been able to contribute much on that front this past week other than pick up Cowboy from doggie daycare and take him to the dog park (which is also a pretty neat kid park) to tire him out so his puppy enthusiasm is a little toned down when he gets home. We have conveniently dropped by, bringing lunch to Kelly a couple of days and, in so doing, have stolen a few moments of serenity as we so enjoy watching the lake from the deck. The kitty, who enjoyed the status of being an "only pet" while in Boston, now has to share the spotlight with the dog so we don't see much of her on our visits.
I have been putting in face time at Audiologic Solutions, Erin's office. Most of you know that I work for her practice, doing patient outreach from our home in Georgia. I usually put in a mere 12 hours a week. Not so while I am on site. I have put in a couple of 10 hour days, as well as some others of more normal length. It is good for me to actually be in the office to see how things run and contribute what I can. The rest of the staff is gracious about answering my constant questions and showing me where things are kept. The work isn't hard, but the stress of feeling like I have just been thrown into the ocean (I don't swim well) has contributed to my discombobulation. The satisfaction of stretching my mind and knowing my contribution is appreciated is rewarding though.
Tom and I have decided we need to get away for a little R & R, so we have decided to take a few days for ourselves. We thoroughly enjoy a good road trip, letting serendipity determine the way. We will generally head in the direction of Vermont because we find it very restful. There will be plenty of photo ops to satisfy Tom and small town quaintness to feed my inner soul. We won't make reservations, though, so we are free to follow the sun in whatever direction we choose. And if it rains on our parade we can always find a charming B&B to provide us with a cozy place to read or make art or just reflect on the past 6 weeks. I think a few days alone together will be heaven.
Next Saturday, May 16th, Kelly will be graduating from Rensselaer Polytechnic Institure (RPI) with her MBA. Considering the obstacles she has had to face throughout the last 18 months, we will all be doing a major victory dance on her behalf when she walks across that stage. We are so proud of her, and are delighted to be here for the big event.
If things continue to go well, we will begin our trek back home to Georgia a day or 2 after graduation. I am not sure if we are anxious enough to get home that a power drive is in order, or if a meandering route taking several days to complete will be the best way to travel. Just knowing that we will be back soon is a soothing balm.
Tomorrow we will all celebrate Mother's Day by going out to brunch. I am so looking forward to all of us being together. It doesn't matter if the weather is cooperative or not!
Happy Mother's Day to all of you. I hope that you will be celebrating in whatever way is most meaningful to you. Remember......you are never done being a mother!
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
Catching Up
We arrived in Albany late on Sunday afternoon. Our car is packed to the roof with all the things we needed to survive in Boston. Now that we are staying at Erin's house we find much of our "stuff" extraneous so most of it did not come in with us. Our car is our overstuffed closet.
It isn't easy living like this. Olivia gives up her room to move in with Sam whenever we visit. Her "stuff", however, remains in her room. Hence, the closet in the driveway.
Every time we come north to visit the kids I find myself wistfully looking at local real estate, wishing for a little place of our own. A house, a cottage, an in-law apartment. Just a place to spread out. It would be fun to have the grands come to spend the night. It would be great to have a place to entertain. It would be wonderful to have a quiet little retreat when we need it.
I look on-line. I look in the paper. I drive around looking for signs; for sale signs, even rental signs. All this looking has become an obsession, but in reality it is only a pastime. We don't spend enough time in New York to justify the taxes and upkeep of a house even if we could find the perfect place on the smallest budget. Why would we want to spend every vacation here doing the necessary upkeep and improvement projects I would be sure to want. Why would we want to have to lay out money to mow a lawn or plow a driveway for a far away place that we only use a fraction of any year. We've never wanted to be snowbirds, spending half the year in the north and the other half in the south. We love our retirement home in Georgia. We love spending time with our Sun City family. Still....there is a powerful draw to be with family.
Surely this has been most eloquently illustrated by our current situation. I feel torn; almost selfish to be planning to return to Georgia in another week or so. But Kelly is doing very well, considering she is barely 3 weeks post op. The healing she needs to do now is a slow process. The restrictions she faces will lessen in time. Others will gladly step up to take our place. For this, we are grateful. The emotional healing will take time too. Gaining confidence in her appearance will happen almost without perception. Emerging from the cocoon may take a while but I know that soon our butterfly will recognize how beautiful she is.
Tomorrow our day will start by attending "Morning Program" at Liv's school. Her principal will present her with the book that her parents are donating to the school library in her name. This is a big honor for a second grader. Liv will get to bring the book home so that we can read it together. We will be back at Liv's school again on Friday for "Grandparent's Day". She is tickled pink that we can participate in this event. So are we. Next Friday we will do it all over again at Sam's school. It is so great to be here to share in these special times.
Tomorrow will be a big day for Kelly. This is the last weekend of the final class in her EMBA program. It is important to be an active participant in class tomorrow and Friday. Her classmates have arranged to pick her up and get her to school. Tom/Eric are on call to pick her up the moment she feels she has reached her limit. Graduation is May 16. The timing could be better, but this is the goal Kelly has been seeking for two years now. Keep your fingers crossed for her.
I'll keep you posted.
I will keep you posted on our plans. We look forward to being home soon.
It isn't easy living like this. Olivia gives up her room to move in with Sam whenever we visit. Her "stuff", however, remains in her room. Hence, the closet in the driveway.
Every time we come north to visit the kids I find myself wistfully looking at local real estate, wishing for a little place of our own. A house, a cottage, an in-law apartment. Just a place to spread out. It would be fun to have the grands come to spend the night. It would be great to have a place to entertain. It would be wonderful to have a quiet little retreat when we need it.
I look on-line. I look in the paper. I drive around looking for signs; for sale signs, even rental signs. All this looking has become an obsession, but in reality it is only a pastime. We don't spend enough time in New York to justify the taxes and upkeep of a house even if we could find the perfect place on the smallest budget. Why would we want to spend every vacation here doing the necessary upkeep and improvement projects I would be sure to want. Why would we want to have to lay out money to mow a lawn or plow a driveway for a far away place that we only use a fraction of any year. We've never wanted to be snowbirds, spending half the year in the north and the other half in the south. We love our retirement home in Georgia. We love spending time with our Sun City family. Still....there is a powerful draw to be with family.
Surely this has been most eloquently illustrated by our current situation. I feel torn; almost selfish to be planning to return to Georgia in another week or so. But Kelly is doing very well, considering she is barely 3 weeks post op. The healing she needs to do now is a slow process. The restrictions she faces will lessen in time. Others will gladly step up to take our place. For this, we are grateful. The emotional healing will take time too. Gaining confidence in her appearance will happen almost without perception. Emerging from the cocoon may take a while but I know that soon our butterfly will recognize how beautiful she is.
Tomorrow our day will start by attending "Morning Program" at Liv's school. Her principal will present her with the book that her parents are donating to the school library in her name. This is a big honor for a second grader. Liv will get to bring the book home so that we can read it together. We will be back at Liv's school again on Friday for "Grandparent's Day". She is tickled pink that we can participate in this event. So are we. Next Friday we will do it all over again at Sam's school. It is so great to be here to share in these special times.
Tomorrow will be a big day for Kelly. This is the last weekend of the final class in her EMBA program. It is important to be an active participant in class tomorrow and Friday. Her classmates have arranged to pick her up and get her to school. Tom/Eric are on call to pick her up the moment she feels she has reached her limit. Graduation is May 16. The timing could be better, but this is the goal Kelly has been seeking for two years now. Keep your fingers crossed for her.
I'll keep you posted.
I will keep you posted on our plans. We look forward to being home soon.
Saturday, April 25, 2009
Transitions
I can hardly believe that we have been in Boston almost a month. The lease on the apartment expires on Thursday. Where did the time go????
Tom and I will be packing up and heading back to Albany tomorrow. Kelly and Eric will stay a few more days to allow Kelly a little more healing time before making the long car ride home. They have to deal with picking up the dog at Eric's brother's before they can start the 3 hour trip. Even minor bumps in the road cause Kelly discomfort, as well as turns and stops. Thank goodness she is within driving distance. I can't imagine how difficult it would be if she had to fly home.
Just as we have been consciously weening Kelly down on the meds it is now time to step back a little to encourage more independence. There are still so many things that Kelly will need help with for weeks to come. She can't drive yet. Or walk the dog. Or carry groceries or books. She can't push the vacuum or do laundry. It is pretty hard to hold yourself back when you see so many things needing to be done. Still, I think being home will be a boon to healing.
Crazy as it sounds, Kelly hopes to be in class on Thursday. The EMBA program is nearing the end. Even so, the last few weeks involve intense classes that last all day. We will see that she gets to class but we will remain close by to be able to pick her up the moment she says she has had enough. I think it is emotionally necessary for Kelly to join her team and do whatever she can do, as long as she doesn't jeopardize her recovery.
Tom and I will be staying with Erin and her family during this transition phase. Erin lives only about 20 minutes from Kelly and Eric so we will be running back and forth. We are looking forward to finally celebrating Olivia's 8th birthday (April 18) and participating in a special Grandparent's Day at her school. It will be a bit more hectic juggling all these roles. We are grateful to be able to help our family in any way we can.
It won't be long before we are planning our trip back to Georgia. Our friends at Sun City Peachtree have held us up through this time of crisis in our life. Mary and Jack have looked after the plants and birds. Barbara and John have collected, sorted and forwarded all pertinent mail. Barbara also picked up my responsibilities with the Paper Arts Club activities. Dave and Barbara have documented the first blooming of the cherry tree we planted last summer. Others have covered our scheduled work time at the Amenities Center. Pam is responsible for prompting so many people to sent cards, flowers, prayers and well wishes. Our family, too, has been extremely supportive calling, sending cards and messages. I don't know how I will ever thank everybody.
I hope that you all have been following Kelly's story here as I have not had the time to answer every e-mail. Just know that we appreciate each and every one of you. We are truly blessed.
Tom and I will be packing up and heading back to Albany tomorrow. Kelly and Eric will stay a few more days to allow Kelly a little more healing time before making the long car ride home. They have to deal with picking up the dog at Eric's brother's before they can start the 3 hour trip. Even minor bumps in the road cause Kelly discomfort, as well as turns and stops. Thank goodness she is within driving distance. I can't imagine how difficult it would be if she had to fly home.
Just as we have been consciously weening Kelly down on the meds it is now time to step back a little to encourage more independence. There are still so many things that Kelly will need help with for weeks to come. She can't drive yet. Or walk the dog. Or carry groceries or books. She can't push the vacuum or do laundry. It is pretty hard to hold yourself back when you see so many things needing to be done. Still, I think being home will be a boon to healing.
Crazy as it sounds, Kelly hopes to be in class on Thursday. The EMBA program is nearing the end. Even so, the last few weeks involve intense classes that last all day. We will see that she gets to class but we will remain close by to be able to pick her up the moment she says she has had enough. I think it is emotionally necessary for Kelly to join her team and do whatever she can do, as long as she doesn't jeopardize her recovery.
Tom and I will be staying with Erin and her family during this transition phase. Erin lives only about 20 minutes from Kelly and Eric so we will be running back and forth. We are looking forward to finally celebrating Olivia's 8th birthday (April 18) and participating in a special Grandparent's Day at her school. It will be a bit more hectic juggling all these roles. We are grateful to be able to help our family in any way we can.
It won't be long before we are planning our trip back to Georgia. Our friends at Sun City Peachtree have held us up through this time of crisis in our life. Mary and Jack have looked after the plants and birds. Barbara and John have collected, sorted and forwarded all pertinent mail. Barbara also picked up my responsibilities with the Paper Arts Club activities. Dave and Barbara have documented the first blooming of the cherry tree we planted last summer. Others have covered our scheduled work time at the Amenities Center. Pam is responsible for prompting so many people to sent cards, flowers, prayers and well wishes. Our family, too, has been extremely supportive calling, sending cards and messages. I don't know how I will ever thank everybody.
I hope that you all have been following Kelly's story here as I have not had the time to answer every e-mail. Just know that we appreciate each and every one of you. We are truly blessed.
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
Lookin' Good!
I took this picture of Kelly and Eric tonight, just before we walked to a neighborhood pub for dinner. Kelly was really proud of being dressed in something other than jammies or yoga pants. She felt good and she looked good. You can tell by Eric's smile that he is pretty pleased too.
It is hard to believe how far Kelly has come since her surgery on April 6th. The removal of the final drain on Monday of this week was liberating, both physically and mentally. The healing will continue, slowly. It will be some time before Kelly's strength and stamina return. It's not over yet, but look how far she has come!
We are beginning to pack up now. Eric will make a trip home to Albany tomorrow to drop off a load of "stuff" and to spend a little time at the office. When he comes back on Friday we will continue packing up in expectation of leaving Boston soon. It is not certain just when Kelly will feel ready for a 3+ hour car ride back to Albany. As she says, she has a perfect little healing nest here. When she goes back home she will have to make adjustments in many different aspects of her life. Still, I suspect that we will be gone soon.
Tom and I will also be going to Albany. It is too soon for us to speculate how much longer Kelly will need assistance. Certainly we want to see her settled in and adjusting to being on her own once Eric start back to work. They have a good support network at home and they will reach out once they have assessed their needs. We are also eager to see the Erin, Dan and the grand kids.
Tomorrow I will notify the post office to forward all mail to Kelly and Eric's home address:
182 Morey Park Road
Nassau, NY 12123
If you have cards to send please use that address from this point on.
My entries may be a little sporadic for a few days, but don't give up on me. We all appreciate your support and prayers.
Till the next time.....
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
Marathon
Monday was Patriot's Day, a Massachusetts holiday. Schools are closed. So are many businesses. It is a day marked by several traditions. The Red Sox always play a home game, well attended by passionate fans. The more well known Patriot's Day tradition (to the rest of the world) is the Boston Marathon.
The course of the race brings it within blocks of our temporary Boston home. The fellows had scoped out opportune spots for photo taking the day before. Tom set out early to be in place between mile marker 25 and the finish line. It turned out to be the ideal spot for capturing not only the physical motion of the race but also the raw emotion that was so plain on many faces.
There was a strong contingent of handicapped "runners". Some were in wheel chairs, some were on contraptions that looked like varied incarnations of recumbent bicycles. Some athletes were able to "pedal" with their legs, some used their hands. There was even a double amputee on two artificial legs, accompanied by "guides" on either side of him. The dedication, determination and pride on the faces of these participants was humbling. The crowd was totally involved, cheering with passion.
Tom took hundreds of pictures. He recorded athletes of all sizes, ages and levels of ability. He documented the winner's faces as they neared the finish line. He captured the pain of those struggling to the end of a long 26+ mile journey; a stitch in the side here, a grimace there. But always the participants rallied as the crowd cheered them on. You can seem to do the impossible when you have a sea of supporters out there.
It feels like we have been through our own marathon recently. We are weary, but in high spirits knowing that the race has been worth running. Each day Kelly gains a little strength. Her bubbly personality has, once again, emerged. Her determination has never flagged. She is in this for the long haul and though the finish line is still a ways off, she will face it with the passion of a marathon runner. You are her cheering crowd. Your cards and messages are like pats on the back, two thumbs up, cheers and whistles. Your support is what is holding us up.
We'll keep on running the good race.
Monday, April 20, 2009
Another Point of View
I know not all of you follow Kelly's CaringBridge journal. With her permission I am posting an entry that she made there on Sunday, April 19.
From Kelly:
"Hey y'all - it's MEEEE!
Have you deleted that 'auto notify' yet, on these updates? :)
We've shared a lot of milestones this weekend, not the least of which is me feeling with it enough to post right now. Catching up from the emergency room was exhausting - physically and mentally. Getting my sleep back, getting the pain under control, weaning down to a more reasonable level of meds... I think it's taken me the weekend to do that and make forward progress. But I have.
On Friday, my visiting nurse told me it was time to venture outside. I can't begin to explain to you the psychological difficulty in this small request, but I'm sure you can imagine my discomfort with being anywhere near people, having surgical drains, bruising, swelling and pain. But I did- starting first with a small stroll up the street and back, and next to a nearby pub to meet wonderful friends for lunch. That exhausted me completely, but I recharged and by today was ready to strike out across a different street to a Cheesecake Factory for lunch with Mom, Dad and Eric. I was pleased with myself, because there were people everywhere due to the Boston marathon check-in very nearby.
My physical progress has happened more quickly than my mental/emotional. Again, won't try to explain too much, but I feel somewhat vulnerable getting out there - especially seeing people from 'home' or who know me well. I tiptoed up to that hurdle too, meeting up with a few close friends from home. On the mental side, I haven't had the energy to focus for any length of time. Books and movies have been of little interest, let alone my much neglected studies. I'll get there in time, but I'm now aware enough of my neglect to feel a little pressure. Just trying to concentrate when I chatted with a school cohort today made me feel a little teary and panicky. I know, give it some time. I watched a full two hour movie only two nights ago, and it was a revelation.
I've appreciated the small moments of awareness that come my way, like how clean I can get my teeth when I have the strength to brush properly, or how nice it feels to wear contacts and sunglasses when I can finally lift my other hand enough to get the contacts into my eyes. So too, I realize the pure joy of having someone else fill my water bottle or adjust my pillows or put the mail in my lap, these things that aren't dependencies but liberators because I get to save my energy for something bigger. There's always something to strive for (like putting on my own socks!), and I prioritize my energy like I used to prioritize my time. Funny parallels.
I am starting to look forward to our return home, when I can see people in my own environment and take on all the challenges of being independent (or not) there. I am starting to realize I will miss the close access to friends and family out here, who I normally don't get to see several times or more in one week.
I am also starting to realize how many people it's taken to get me back even to this state of health, and how much farther I have to go. Not just Mom, Eric and Dad, but all of you who leave notes here or who send notes and cards in the mail, who are doing things for us here and back at home. Holy cow. What a force! I'll get thank yous out individually, I will. :) For now, know that you've done more than your fair share and I appreciate and love every ounce of care that went into each note, wherever it was sent.
I'm going to continue doing my part to heal and gain strength.
Love,
Kel"
Amen to that.
From Kelly:
"Hey y'all - it's MEEEE!
Have you deleted that 'auto notify' yet, on these updates? :)
We've shared a lot of milestones this weekend, not the least of which is me feeling with it enough to post right now. Catching up from the emergency room was exhausting - physically and mentally. Getting my sleep back, getting the pain under control, weaning down to a more reasonable level of meds... I think it's taken me the weekend to do that and make forward progress. But I have.
On Friday, my visiting nurse told me it was time to venture outside. I can't begin to explain to you the psychological difficulty in this small request, but I'm sure you can imagine my discomfort with being anywhere near people, having surgical drains, bruising, swelling and pain. But I did- starting first with a small stroll up the street and back, and next to a nearby pub to meet wonderful friends for lunch. That exhausted me completely, but I recharged and by today was ready to strike out across a different street to a Cheesecake Factory for lunch with Mom, Dad and Eric. I was pleased with myself, because there were people everywhere due to the Boston marathon check-in very nearby.
My physical progress has happened more quickly than my mental/emotional. Again, won't try to explain too much, but I feel somewhat vulnerable getting out there - especially seeing people from 'home' or who know me well. I tiptoed up to that hurdle too, meeting up with a few close friends from home. On the mental side, I haven't had the energy to focus for any length of time. Books and movies have been of little interest, let alone my much neglected studies. I'll get there in time, but I'm now aware enough of my neglect to feel a little pressure. Just trying to concentrate when I chatted with a school cohort today made me feel a little teary and panicky. I know, give it some time. I watched a full two hour movie only two nights ago, and it was a revelation.
I've appreciated the small moments of awareness that come my way, like how clean I can get my teeth when I have the strength to brush properly, or how nice it feels to wear contacts and sunglasses when I can finally lift my other hand enough to get the contacts into my eyes. So too, I realize the pure joy of having someone else fill my water bottle or adjust my pillows or put the mail in my lap, these things that aren't dependencies but liberators because I get to save my energy for something bigger. There's always something to strive for (like putting on my own socks!), and I prioritize my energy like I used to prioritize my time. Funny parallels.
I am starting to look forward to our return home, when I can see people in my own environment and take on all the challenges of being independent (or not) there. I am starting to realize I will miss the close access to friends and family out here, who I normally don't get to see several times or more in one week.
I am also starting to realize how many people it's taken to get me back even to this state of health, and how much farther I have to go. Not just Mom, Eric and Dad, but all of you who leave notes here or who send notes and cards in the mail, who are doing things for us here and back at home. Holy cow. What a force! I'll get thank yous out individually, I will. :) For now, know that you've done more than your fair share and I appreciate and love every ounce of care that went into each note, wherever it was sent.
I'm going to continue doing my part to heal and gain strength.
Love,
Kel"
Amen to that.
Sunday, April 19, 2009
Saturday Explorations
Saturday was a gray day in Boston. We expected sunshine. We got a light drizzle instead. Still, it was pleasant enough for a good walk.
Tom and I shunned the subway and decided to walk to the Isabella Stewart Gardner Museum about 20 minutes away. Two subway stops or a twenty minute walk makes this ISGM practically in our back yard. So why even consider the subway? Well, spring weather in Boston is still a bit chillier and damper than in Georgia. My hips and my knees have been protesting even when I think it is a beautiful day. Mom always said, "It's hell to get old".
Anyway, back to our walk. Boston, on foot, is a city of angled streets, uneven brick or cobble sidewalks, entire blocks of attached 5-7 story buildings, trolleys, and sirens. Lots of sirens. Day and night sirens. If you aren't watching your feet so as not to stumble, you are looking over your shoulder for where the siren is coming from or going to.
The street level of many buildings house shops of all kinds. There are lots of ethnic places to eat, an Au Bon Pain (Boston's upscale answer to Waffle House) on every corner, dry cleaners, Starbucks and convenience stores. On the more residential streets the tall, narrow, stone or brick buildings have minuscule front gardens, big stoops and, if we are lucky, glass doors so we can peek into the tiny lobbies possibly to spy some vintage tiles. Real estate takes up valuable space in a busy city like Boston. Several apartment buildings posted inventory signs out front listing the available units. I didn't see a thing under $2500 a month with an occasional spike to $3800 a month. These buildings are OLD. One would expect them to be completely and newly renovated for that kind of money. Somehow I doubt the are. I think the price is driven by location, not condition.
Spring is just beginning to bloom in Boston. There are daffodils everywhere. The tulips are not quite ready. I don't know the variety, but there are magnolia trees in bloom, oven in double rows lining the city streets. Swollen buds are showing on most of the other trees with tiny green leaves beginning to peek out. Pollen is in the air (NOTHING compared to what we experience in George!) and my allergies are in full swing.
We had already experienced the emergence of spring before we left our southern home. We are enjoying the process all over again up north. Having spring come twice is delightful. So much more pleasant than going through two winters in one year.
The Gardner Museum is a 4 story structure behind the Museum of Fine Art. It is not very imposing from the outside. Like many Boston structures it is set very close to the road. Housed in a 15th century style Venetian palace called Fenway Court, the inside consists of 3 floors of galleries built around a stunning courtyard. The art and artifacts are the personal collection of Mrs. Gardner's travels around the world. The art spans centuries and includes significant, well know pieces. One afternoon is certainly not enough time to fully absorb all the culture and beauty.
I had not done any research on this museum before we went so I was suprised when I asked a security card about the empty frames found amidst other prominent exhibits. Apparently there was a major art heist at the ISGM in 1990 that has not been solved to this day. I love a good mystery so upon arriving home I went straight to my computer to dig up some facts. If you love a mystery too, then I suggest that you might enjoy exploring this website: http://boston.com/news/specials/gardner_heist/heist/
Today, Sunday, is clear and sunny. Kelly is feeling pretty chipper. She 'seems a bit more independent today. She is fussing with droopy flower arrangements, insisted that she take a small bag of "botanical waste" to the garbage chute and passed the visiting nurse's exam with flying colors. She is starting to think about going back to Albany and their beloved lake cottage. The dog has been at "camp" for almost 3 weeks. I am not sure who is missing whom more.
Kelly expects to have her third, and final, drain removed tomorrow. If the surgeon gives her the green light we will begin to make our plans to leave the wilds of Boston for the tranquil countryside of upstate New York.
I'll keep you posted.
Saturday, April 18, 2009
No News
They say, "No news is good news". I am happy to report that, in this case, that is so true. We have no blips or backslides to report. In fact, Kelly seems to gain a little strength every day.
Yesterday the visiting nurse suggested that it was time to start venturing outside. She has walked the corridor a few times. Twice she has been up to the rooftop terrace for a breath of fresh air. The trip to the ER and to see the doctor the next day afforded a change in scenery, but the amount of time spent out doors was limited at best.
With a lot of encouragement an apprehensive Kelly took to the streets of Boston for a two block stroll to a corner pub. The friends that had been to visit the night before joined us for a bite of lunch. Kelly was definitely ready to sit down by the time we arrived at Woody's. In fact she admits to sizing up some of the stoops of the old brownstones we passed along the way as potential "parking" spots. Still, she persevered. Tom mentioned that he would be willing to go get the car to bring her back when lunch was done but Kelly was determined to make the walk.
Walking any distance at all is still a challenge. The amount of skin and fat removed from Kelly's tummy was like a big cat's eye shape. The incision goes from hip to hip. The skin is drawn tight making it difficult for her to stand straight. The tension will ease over time and walking will become easier every day.
Walking to Woody's was more than enough exercise for one day. Maybe a little too much. Kelly slept the afternoon away. I'm sure it was a good sleep; a satisfied sleep. Facing challenges square on what Kelly excels at.
Wonder where she will want to walk to today.
Yesterday the visiting nurse suggested that it was time to start venturing outside. She has walked the corridor a few times. Twice she has been up to the rooftop terrace for a breath of fresh air. The trip to the ER and to see the doctor the next day afforded a change in scenery, but the amount of time spent out doors was limited at best.
With a lot of encouragement an apprehensive Kelly took to the streets of Boston for a two block stroll to a corner pub. The friends that had been to visit the night before joined us for a bite of lunch. Kelly was definitely ready to sit down by the time we arrived at Woody's. In fact she admits to sizing up some of the stoops of the old brownstones we passed along the way as potential "parking" spots. Still, she persevered. Tom mentioned that he would be willing to go get the car to bring her back when lunch was done but Kelly was determined to make the walk.
Walking any distance at all is still a challenge. The amount of skin and fat removed from Kelly's tummy was like a big cat's eye shape. The incision goes from hip to hip. The skin is drawn tight making it difficult for her to stand straight. The tension will ease over time and walking will become easier every day.
Walking to Woody's was more than enough exercise for one day. Maybe a little too much. Kelly slept the afternoon away. I'm sure it was a good sleep; a satisfied sleep. Facing challenges square on what Kelly excels at.
Wonder where she will want to walk to today.
Thursday, April 16, 2009
A Beautiful Day
What a beautiful day it is in Boston. The sun is shining, the sky is blue and we have good news to report.
Kelly saw Dr. Caterson, her plastic surgeon, today. Dr. C. is very pleased with the healing process. A second drain was removed. One more to go; perhaps next week. Incisions are healing well and the pain is manageable.
In addition, the official pathology report has come back. The only cancer found was the D.C.I.S. that we knew about. Nothing invasive, nothing new. Woo hoo! The next milestone will be discussing future treatment with the oncologist, but there is no reason for chemo. This is indeed good news. Kelly still has miles to go in her recovery, but for now we can appreciate today as a beautiful day.
Rebecca came today as relief caregiver. She accompanied Kelly and Eric to the doctor and then they all went out to lunch to celebrate the good report. That was probably a bit much for Kelly to undertake but it did a lot for her spirits. When they arrived home she promptly went to sleep for a well deserved nap.
Tom and I took advantage of Rebecca's offer to get out for a while ourselves. Today we went to the Boston College campus to see an exhibit of book art at the McMullen Museum (http://www.bc.edu/bc_org/avp/cas/artmuseum/exhibitions/archive/book-as-art/index.html). After viewing the exhibit we wandered our way to the college bookstore to buy a copy of the show catalog. College bookstores are so much fun! We even had lunch in the college cafeteria before heading home. Thanks, Stephanie, for the heads up on this fun outing.
Some friends of Kelly and Eric from Albany are stopping in this evening for a chance to see for themselves how our patient is doing. Many people have been keeping in touch via e-mail, snail mail and e-mail. It means a lot to Kelly and Eric to know that so many people care about them so much. It is rather humbling to be the one on the receiving end of all the cards, gifts and prayers. I say it is a rather well earned position as both Kelly and Eric are among the first to reach out when someone is in need. Sooner or later we all have the opportunity to play both roles. The key, I think, is the grace with which you do so.
I, too, am humbled by the huge outpouring of support our family has received. The people at Sun City Peachtree in particular, whether they know us or not, have been major contributors in the card category. Many thanks to Pam for rallying interest on our behalf. Kelly is overwhelmed with the shear number of cards and messages she has received from Georgia. Thank you, thank you, thank you. The mailman may not be smiling but we are!
Good news is so satisfying to report. Ahhhhhhhh.
Kelly saw Dr. Caterson, her plastic surgeon, today. Dr. C. is very pleased with the healing process. A second drain was removed. One more to go; perhaps next week. Incisions are healing well and the pain is manageable.
In addition, the official pathology report has come back. The only cancer found was the D.C.I.S. that we knew about. Nothing invasive, nothing new. Woo hoo! The next milestone will be discussing future treatment with the oncologist, but there is no reason for chemo. This is indeed good news. Kelly still has miles to go in her recovery, but for now we can appreciate today as a beautiful day.
Rebecca came today as relief caregiver. She accompanied Kelly and Eric to the doctor and then they all went out to lunch to celebrate the good report. That was probably a bit much for Kelly to undertake but it did a lot for her spirits. When they arrived home she promptly went to sleep for a well deserved nap.
Tom and I took advantage of Rebecca's offer to get out for a while ourselves. Today we went to the Boston College campus to see an exhibit of book art at the McMullen Museum (http://www.bc.edu/bc_org/avp/cas/artmuseum/exhibitions/archive/book-as-art/index.html). After viewing the exhibit we wandered our way to the college bookstore to buy a copy of the show catalog. College bookstores are so much fun! We even had lunch in the college cafeteria before heading home. Thanks, Stephanie, for the heads up on this fun outing.
Some friends of Kelly and Eric from Albany are stopping in this evening for a chance to see for themselves how our patient is doing. Many people have been keeping in touch via e-mail, snail mail and e-mail. It means a lot to Kelly and Eric to know that so many people care about them so much. It is rather humbling to be the one on the receiving end of all the cards, gifts and prayers. I say it is a rather well earned position as both Kelly and Eric are among the first to reach out when someone is in need. Sooner or later we all have the opportunity to play both roles. The key, I think, is the grace with which you do so.
I, too, am humbled by the huge outpouring of support our family has received. The people at Sun City Peachtree in particular, whether they know us or not, have been major contributors in the card category. Many thanks to Pam for rallying interest on our behalf. Kelly is overwhelmed with the shear number of cards and messages she has received from Georgia. Thank you, thank you, thank you. The mailman may not be smiling but we are!
Good news is so satisfying to report. Ahhhhhhhh.
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
Myth Busters
Kelly has been superstitious about removing the ID bracelet that was put on her during the admission process at Brigham and Women's Hospital. She told me that by continuing to wear the plastic wristband she was safe from any chance of having to return to the hospital. I am here to tell you that there is no validity to that particular myth.
Very early this morning Kelly had to exchange that wristband for a new one as she was admitted to the ER. She had been complaining for several days about pain and burning in her left chest and shoulder as well as irritation of the drain tube that exited her body in the left armpit. Last night the pain increased. She was unable to take a deep breath and she was becoming alarmed. Kelly alerted Eric to the escalating situation at 1 AM when he brought her medications to her. They agreed to pay attention and see how things were a little farther down the road.
Even though some of you have never met our daughter, it should come as no surprise that she spent the next several hours researching her symptoms on a computer suspended just above her lap. Ultimately, K & E made the decision to contact the hospital with their concerns. At 4 AM they woke us to say that they were heading out to the Emergency Room. I ran the checklist with Kelly and agreed that it was the best decision (not that she needed my approval; rather I needed to clear my head of sleep and understand what was happening in the middle of the night).
They put Kelly through a complete workup with and EKG, blood tests, IV's. They gave her morphine for the pain. The tests quickly ruled out any cardiac problems. The next area of concern was a possible pulmonary embolism. A CT scan was ordered and her surgeon was paged. There was no clot, thank God.
On physical examination, Dr. Caterson determined that the source of the pain was directly related to the drain tube in her chest. Perhaps the internal end of the tube was irritating a nerve, she thought. Though it was sooner than planned, the chest drain was removed and Kelly was sent home with the expectation that she should feel better within 24 hours.
We had been dialing the pain medications down with good success. However, this ordeal demanded that those meds be increased back to the level they were at discharge. Needless to say, Kelly slept most of the day today, knocked out by the increased level of medication and the total lack of sleep during the night. She is up now, feeling more rested and in less pain than this morning. It is good to see her smile again after such a big scare. She has an appointment with Dr. Caterson tomorrow and we expect nothing but good news. I might add that Kelly promptly removed her newly acquired ID bracelet as soon as she got home. Amen to that myth.
It has been a long haul with lots of stress, but I wouldn't, no, couldn't be anywhere else. Despite the circumstances it has been a pleasure to spend this time with Kelly and Eric. Living a thousand miles apart means that we don't see them as often as we would like. But when family needs you, you are there. You face what you must, but you face it together. Don't kid yourself that your job is ever done, because it's not.
Take care of each other.
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
Fresh Air
Today turned out to be a good day for stretching our legs. Tom and I took the afternoon off and got out for a little fresh air and some local exploration. We had lunch in the shopping center at the Prudential Building, then walked over to Copley Square for a bit more sight seeing. We chatted up the tour guides and picked up brochures for when we are able to be away for longer periods of time.
There is so much to see and do in Boston. While we are not here on vacation we do look forward to absorbing as much of the city as we can in the limited time available. As I have mentioned before we are surrounded by higher education (read lots of students) museums and culture.
There is a little violin store almost directly below our apartment on the ground floor. The owner is a Russian emigre who makes violins by hand. The shop is eye catching in that there are double racks of violins of all sizes hanging against a deep green wall. Below the racks of violins is a row of cellos. The repetition of form and the symmetry of the instruments is pleasing to the eye.
Tom stopped by the shop today to chat with the owner about possibly shooting some photos of the place. At first the gentleman was hesitant but soon warmed to Tom's assurances that the photos were for personal use. Tom will go back another time to take the photos. However, during his chat it was mentioned that a small jazz group would be performing in the shop after hours tonight. Tom and I decided to go see what it was all about.
The group of five musicians were very loosely organized and, frankly, not very good. They were mostly middle aged men who had played together on and off for some time. Let me just say that they won't be invited to perform on the next Playboy Jazz Cruise. We left after an hour, depleting the audience by 50%. Oh well. It was an experience.
It was a good day for Kelly, too. We spent the morning getting ready for a lunchtime visit from Eric's brother and sister in law. While Tom and I were out the two couples had a good chat. After lunch Kelly was able to snooze a bit and Eric put in some work time. Later in the afternoon the visiting nurse came. She gave Kelly high marks for her progress but cautioned her not to try to be up and about too much. Patience isn't one of Kelly's strongest qualities.
Tomorrow will be Kelly's first opportunity for a breath of fresh air as she has an appointment with her doctor. She is a little apprehensive about riding in the car and walking from the parking garage, but Eric will be there to steady her and see that she is as comfortable as possible. I am sure it will take a lot out of her. She will certainly be looking forward to her afternoon nap tomorrow.
Once again, let me say thanks for keeping Kelly and the rest of us in your prayers.
Till tomorrow.....
There is so much to see and do in Boston. While we are not here on vacation we do look forward to absorbing as much of the city as we can in the limited time available. As I have mentioned before we are surrounded by higher education (read lots of students) museums and culture.
There is a little violin store almost directly below our apartment on the ground floor. The owner is a Russian emigre who makes violins by hand. The shop is eye catching in that there are double racks of violins of all sizes hanging against a deep green wall. Below the racks of violins is a row of cellos. The repetition of form and the symmetry of the instruments is pleasing to the eye.
Tom stopped by the shop today to chat with the owner about possibly shooting some photos of the place. At first the gentleman was hesitant but soon warmed to Tom's assurances that the photos were for personal use. Tom will go back another time to take the photos. However, during his chat it was mentioned that a small jazz group would be performing in the shop after hours tonight. Tom and I decided to go see what it was all about.
The group of five musicians were very loosely organized and, frankly, not very good. They were mostly middle aged men who had played together on and off for some time. Let me just say that they won't be invited to perform on the next Playboy Jazz Cruise. We left after an hour, depleting the audience by 50%. Oh well. It was an experience.
It was a good day for Kelly, too. We spent the morning getting ready for a lunchtime visit from Eric's brother and sister in law. While Tom and I were out the two couples had a good chat. After lunch Kelly was able to snooze a bit and Eric put in some work time. Later in the afternoon the visiting nurse came. She gave Kelly high marks for her progress but cautioned her not to try to be up and about too much. Patience isn't one of Kelly's strongest qualities.
Tomorrow will be Kelly's first opportunity for a breath of fresh air as she has an appointment with her doctor. She is a little apprehensive about riding in the car and walking from the parking garage, but Eric will be there to steady her and see that she is as comfortable as possible. I am sure it will take a lot out of her. She will certainly be looking forward to her afternoon nap tomorrow.
Once again, let me say thanks for keeping Kelly and the rest of us in your prayers.
Till tomorrow.....
Monday, April 13, 2009
Four Hour Chunks
I don't know how we can get so little done in the course of a day. I brought lots of projects and work, as well as several books to fill the many hours we will be spending at home. Those projects remain untouched. They beckon to me every day and I think, "Maybe today". I don't think I planned very well. I thought in terms of filling several hours at a time. In reality, free time comes in small segments.
With three caregivers you would think that the time spent tending to our patient would still leave plenty of opportunity for whiling away an afternoon. We pass our days in 4 hour chunks. The 4 hour divisions are when medication is given to Kelly. In between we spend time fluffing and plumping pillows, bathing and brushing, foraging for food, refreshing flower vases, playing with the grandcat and generally trying to be quiet while Kelly dozes. Some time is spent accompanying Kelly on walks in the corridor, or assisting her with exercises the physical therapist provided. Some time is spent with the visiting nurse as she checks wounds and assesses our caregiving capabilities. And sometimes we just have to do the mundane household chores of cleaning bathrooms, making meals and toting garbage.
Our pace is slow. Our movements are subdued and quiet. Our sleep is sporadic. A trip to the drugstore or to the coffee shop is an adventure in the crisp, fresh air. We are a good team, practially finishing each other's sentences, so to speak, when it comes to meeting every need of whoever has a need at the moment.
Eric has turned out to be a good nurse. He reads Kelly's mood, anticipating her needs before she can even voice them. He is incredibly patient and kind, showing his love for her in every gesture. He is her strongest advocate and he does it well.
Tom is a sweet and gentle caregiver. He also likes to amuse Kelly and make her smile. He is the first to volunteer for an errand (he always takes his camera). He has set up a spreadsheet where he keeps track of the many, many cards and gifts that arrive daily so that Kelly can send thank you notes when she is able. He did the laundry today so that I could attend to Kelly and Eric could go to the rooftop clubhouse to get some work done.
Easter Sunday was a little busy. As the visiting nurse concluded her visit, Rebecca stopped by to spend some time gabbing with Kelly about anything but surgery. Later Polly, Eric's mom, came for Easter dinner. No ham here. Kelly requested roast chicken, I think, so that I could make another batch of chicken soup with the leftovers. Nothing like a good bowl of Mom'schicken soup when you are recuperating!
Kelly's surgery was just one week ago today. That was a long, long day with unending hours of time to fill. I think I like four hour chunks better.
With three caregivers you would think that the time spent tending to our patient would still leave plenty of opportunity for whiling away an afternoon. We pass our days in 4 hour chunks. The 4 hour divisions are when medication is given to Kelly. In between we spend time fluffing and plumping pillows, bathing and brushing, foraging for food, refreshing flower vases, playing with the grandcat and generally trying to be quiet while Kelly dozes. Some time is spent accompanying Kelly on walks in the corridor, or assisting her with exercises the physical therapist provided. Some time is spent with the visiting nurse as she checks wounds and assesses our caregiving capabilities. And sometimes we just have to do the mundane household chores of cleaning bathrooms, making meals and toting garbage.
Our pace is slow. Our movements are subdued and quiet. Our sleep is sporadic. A trip to the drugstore or to the coffee shop is an adventure in the crisp, fresh air. We are a good team, practially finishing each other's sentences, so to speak, when it comes to meeting every need of whoever has a need at the moment.
Eric has turned out to be a good nurse. He reads Kelly's mood, anticipating her needs before she can even voice them. He is incredibly patient and kind, showing his love for her in every gesture. He is her strongest advocate and he does it well.
Tom is a sweet and gentle caregiver. He also likes to amuse Kelly and make her smile. He is the first to volunteer for an errand (he always takes his camera). He has set up a spreadsheet where he keeps track of the many, many cards and gifts that arrive daily so that Kelly can send thank you notes when she is able. He did the laundry today so that I could attend to Kelly and Eric could go to the rooftop clubhouse to get some work done.
Easter Sunday was a little busy. As the visiting nurse concluded her visit, Rebecca stopped by to spend some time gabbing with Kelly about anything but surgery. Later Polly, Eric's mom, came for Easter dinner. No ham here. Kelly requested roast chicken, I think, so that I could make another batch of chicken soup with the leftovers. Nothing like a good bowl of Mom'schicken soup when you are recuperating!
Kelly's surgery was just one week ago today. That was a long, long day with unending hours of time to fill. I think I like four hour chunks better.
Sunday, April 12, 2009
Saturday, April 11, 2009
Done In
Having to tend to a post-surgical patient is a lot like having a new baby in the house. Not that Kelly is a baby, but the schedule that must be kept is similar. We set the alarm and take turns getting up several times during the night to administer medications. We want to keep on a very regimented schedule to be sure the pain doesn't get the upper hand. Seems to be working. We are a good team.
As a result of this schedule we are all feeling done in. Today has been necessarily very low key. Except for the visiting nurse that is, who spent about an hour and a half filling out paperwork and then going over Kelly from head to toe. Despite the fact that tomorrow is Easter Sunday, she will be back tomorrow and again every day.
Kelly has been up and down from her chair a number of times today. She even managed a walk in the corridor. The two surgery sites and the 3 drain sites are looking pretty good. She is eating better today, especially enjoying Rebecca's homemade mac, mushroom and cheese. I need to get that recipe. Kelly is still napping during the day, but seems much more alert when she is up. Any activity seems to wear her out completely. Rest is what it is all about.
I am binding all of the cards you are sending into a book for Kelly. It is a nice way to display cards when there are too many for every flat surface in the house. It is an easy way for Kel to look at them all again and again. Two more beautiful bouquets of flowers arrived today for a total of seven. Then there are the food gifts: gourmet cupcakes, chocolates, pretzels and Rebecca's casseroles. Everyone has been so kind and generous.
Polly (Eric's mom) is coming for dinner tomorrow. I will roast a chicken, at Kelly's request. The weather will still be cold and damp here in New England so I don't think anyone will mind a quiet Easter Sunday inside where it is warm and cozy. Sounds wonderful to me.
Happy Easter, everyone.
As a result of this schedule we are all feeling done in. Today has been necessarily very low key. Except for the visiting nurse that is, who spent about an hour and a half filling out paperwork and then going over Kelly from head to toe. Despite the fact that tomorrow is Easter Sunday, she will be back tomorrow and again every day.
Kelly has been up and down from her chair a number of times today. She even managed a walk in the corridor. The two surgery sites and the 3 drain sites are looking pretty good. She is eating better today, especially enjoying Rebecca's homemade mac, mushroom and cheese. I need to get that recipe. Kelly is still napping during the day, but seems much more alert when she is up. Any activity seems to wear her out completely. Rest is what it is all about.
I am binding all of the cards you are sending into a book for Kelly. It is a nice way to display cards when there are too many for every flat surface in the house. It is an easy way for Kel to look at them all again and again. Two more beautiful bouquets of flowers arrived today for a total of seven. Then there are the food gifts: gourmet cupcakes, chocolates, pretzels and Rebecca's casseroles. Everyone has been so kind and generous.
Polly (Eric's mom) is coming for dinner tomorrow. I will roast a chicken, at Kelly's request. The weather will still be cold and damp here in New England so I don't think anyone will mind a quiet Easter Sunday inside where it is warm and cozy. Sounds wonderful to me.
Happy Easter, everyone.
Friday, April 10, 2009
Catching Up and Winding Down
She's "home"!
It took hours to get Kelly discharged. The process started at 9 AM and culminated at 2:30 PM this afternoon. The day, up to that point, had been overly busy with doctors, nurses and the physical therapist all trying fit in final examinations, one more PT session, food, drugs and a long awaited shower for Kelly, not to mention the packing up.
Tom and I made a mid-morning trip to the hospital to ferry home all the flowers, bags and equipment leaving Eric to transport the precious cargo as tenderly as possible. Hours later, when they finally walked in the door, Kelly had endured all she could possibly endure. She barely made it to her chair before she collapsed in a heap. It was time to just sit and adjust to being "home".
We all need to wind down from the demands and tensions this week has heaped upon us. The kitty is definitely happy to have everyone around her again. She has spent many hours alone since Monday. I think we are all happy to cocoon for a bit.
As well as winding down, Kelly needs to catch up on some sleep, something that doesn't come easily in a hospital setting. After taking her afternoon medications, she just wanted to get into bed and snooze. She took a good 3 hour nap before Eric woke her for dinner and the next round of medications. She looks a little less strained now. That is good. She needs rest to heal. The next few days will focus on that. Of course she needs prescribed exercise and walking to regain her mobility, but her doctor doesn't want her to overdo in the first days home.
We will settle in to a routine in the next few days. We are working out the drug schedule which will require setting an alarm so we don't miss any doses and thus let the pain get ahead of her. Each day will get better and we should all become more relaxed. We are all looking forward to better times ahead.
Many thanks to all who have sent messages, cards, gifts and food. We are blessed to have so many friends who care.
It took hours to get Kelly discharged. The process started at 9 AM and culminated at 2:30 PM this afternoon. The day, up to that point, had been overly busy with doctors, nurses and the physical therapist all trying fit in final examinations, one more PT session, food, drugs and a long awaited shower for Kelly, not to mention the packing up.
Tom and I made a mid-morning trip to the hospital to ferry home all the flowers, bags and equipment leaving Eric to transport the precious cargo as tenderly as possible. Hours later, when they finally walked in the door, Kelly had endured all she could possibly endure. She barely made it to her chair before she collapsed in a heap. It was time to just sit and adjust to being "home".
We all need to wind down from the demands and tensions this week has heaped upon us. The kitty is definitely happy to have everyone around her again. She has spent many hours alone since Monday. I think we are all happy to cocoon for a bit.
As well as winding down, Kelly needs to catch up on some sleep, something that doesn't come easily in a hospital setting. After taking her afternoon medications, she just wanted to get into bed and snooze. She took a good 3 hour nap before Eric woke her for dinner and the next round of medications. She looks a little less strained now. That is good. She needs rest to heal. The next few days will focus on that. Of course she needs prescribed exercise and walking to regain her mobility, but her doctor doesn't want her to overdo in the first days home.
We will settle in to a routine in the next few days. We are working out the drug schedule which will require setting an alarm so we don't miss any doses and thus let the pain get ahead of her. Each day will get better and we should all become more relaxed. We are all looking forward to better times ahead.
Many thanks to all who have sent messages, cards, gifts and food. We are blessed to have so many friends who care.
Thursday, April 9, 2009
No Pressure Here
Sometimes you just have to wonder if any thought goes into certain decisions. Like why did Brigham and Women's Hospital decide to install an Au Bon Pain in the Lobby? Au Bon PAIN? In a hospital? Kelly is convinced that it must be a cruel joke. You do have to wonder what they were thinking.
Scrawled across Kelly's chest in magic marker is "No Pressure Here". No pressure? Really? I mean there couldn't be more pressure when you have to face all that Kelly has had to face lately. Couldn't they have just written "Don't Press Here" and leave it at that? Really. No pressure, huh? What were they thinking?
It has been a long day. Kelly is doing very well, even a little ahead of the curve. She is doing very well, but don't think for one moment that any of it is easy. She hurts. A lot. She is able to get out of bed, get to the bathroom and even walk the halls now. It takes every ounce of strength she has. It drains her. She gets tired of hearing us encourage her to get up, to eat something, to take a little nap. She is uncomfortable lying on her back all day and night. She hates the compression cuffs she must wear on her legs; the flapping johnnie gown, the oxygen up her nose. And who can blame her? No pressure here.
Kelly is a bit apprehensive about coming home tomorrow. She knows that she is doing well. She knows that healing at home is preferable to staying in the hospital. Still......she will have to rely on Eric, Tom and I to assist her until she is strong enough to take care of herself. We will be responsible for certain medical procedures round the clock except for the short time the visiting nurse will be here. Kelly knows that we have had instruction from the nurses and the physical therapist and we have received high marks. But she also knows our experience is severely limited and it doesn't take much jostling to cause her discomfort. I think the hospital represents a certain amount of security. Coming home will take courage and we will all experience some pressure. But this too shall pass.
Ever day brings new milestones and increased strength. Each day brings more independence. Each day brings Kelly closer to returning to a "normal" life. We will continue to work together to see that it happens. Will we have tense moments? Sure, but so what? It won't be long before this will all be behind us and we will move on to new pressures.
Scrawled across Kelly's chest in magic marker is "No Pressure Here". No pressure? Really? I mean there couldn't be more pressure when you have to face all that Kelly has had to face lately. Couldn't they have just written "Don't Press Here" and leave it at that? Really. No pressure, huh? What were they thinking?
It has been a long day. Kelly is doing very well, even a little ahead of the curve. She is doing very well, but don't think for one moment that any of it is easy. She hurts. A lot. She is able to get out of bed, get to the bathroom and even walk the halls now. It takes every ounce of strength she has. It drains her. She gets tired of hearing us encourage her to get up, to eat something, to take a little nap. She is uncomfortable lying on her back all day and night. She hates the compression cuffs she must wear on her legs; the flapping johnnie gown, the oxygen up her nose. And who can blame her? No pressure here.
Kelly is a bit apprehensive about coming home tomorrow. She knows that she is doing well. She knows that healing at home is preferable to staying in the hospital. Still......she will have to rely on Eric, Tom and I to assist her until she is strong enough to take care of herself. We will be responsible for certain medical procedures round the clock except for the short time the visiting nurse will be here. Kelly knows that we have had instruction from the nurses and the physical therapist and we have received high marks. But she also knows our experience is severely limited and it doesn't take much jostling to cause her discomfort. I think the hospital represents a certain amount of security. Coming home will take courage and we will all experience some pressure. But this too shall pass.
Ever day brings new milestones and increased strength. Each day brings more independence. Each day brings Kelly closer to returning to a "normal" life. We will continue to work together to see that it happens. Will we have tense moments? Sure, but so what? It won't be long before this will all be behind us and we will move on to new pressures.
Wednesday, April 8, 2009
Moving Day
Today was moving day for Kelly. She finally left the ICU late this afternoon and settled in to a private room in another section of the hospital. I think she had mixed emotions about leaving the security afforded by the constant attention Intensive Care patients receive.
The Surgical ICU is a busy place. The lighting is bright, everything is white and the place is cluttered with equipment. It is noisy and stuffed full with assigned staff plus all the other personnel who drop in and out. The physicians make rounds with their students, the IV team is always visiting somebody, the physical therapists come to inflict pain as they get patients moving again. Phones ring, machines beep, staff discuss treatment options. It is a wonder anyone gets enough rest to heal. And if you do doze off someone is sure to come by to poke or prod you. Even without staff in your cubicle you have to contend with the automatic blood pressure cuff squeezing your arm until you wake up. This level of activity must be what a bee hive is like.
The seventh floor of the Connors Women and Newborn Unit, a part of Brigham and Womens Hospital, is entirely the opposite. First of all, this part of the hospital is much newer. It is streamlined, modern and serene. The colors are restful, the lighting subdued. These private patient rooms resemble hotel rooms with private baths, mini refrigerators, and flat screen TVs. Even the business part of the room, the oxygen and suction hook ups, are behind a sliding panel to disguise them when they are not needed. The nurses do their jobs discreetly; competent but not in your face. The halls are carpeted and there is interesting artwork on the walls.
Kelly can't see the door from her bed as the room is L shaped. Every little noise causes her to wonder if someone is there for her or if it is just a passerby. She will surely be able to get a good nights rest tonight. She left most of the monitors behind in ICU. The frequency of monitoring her vitals has decreased significantly. The patient controlled pain pump is gone, replaced by pills taken every 4 hours. Soon the catheter will be gone and, with any luck, maybe they will take away the compression wraps on her legs (or maybe not). There is still a long road ahead, but this is definitely progress.
The physical therapist got Kelly on her feet today. She shuffled her way through ICU for a short, exhausting first attempt at walking. Kelly will need to get out of bed and walk at least 3 times a day with the promise that it will be easier each time she does it. But today, for the first attempt, it wasn't easy. I saw fear in Kelly's face when she started. I saw satisfaction when she finished. When you have had major surgery on two parts of your body at once you must take pleasure in the small victories. Shuffling to the nurses station, eating solid food, surviving another IV stick. Got to keep on moving.
Tomorrow will be a better day.
The Surgical ICU is a busy place. The lighting is bright, everything is white and the place is cluttered with equipment. It is noisy and stuffed full with assigned staff plus all the other personnel who drop in and out. The physicians make rounds with their students, the IV team is always visiting somebody, the physical therapists come to inflict pain as they get patients moving again. Phones ring, machines beep, staff discuss treatment options. It is a wonder anyone gets enough rest to heal. And if you do doze off someone is sure to come by to poke or prod you. Even without staff in your cubicle you have to contend with the automatic blood pressure cuff squeezing your arm until you wake up. This level of activity must be what a bee hive is like.
The seventh floor of the Connors Women and Newborn Unit, a part of Brigham and Womens Hospital, is entirely the opposite. First of all, this part of the hospital is much newer. It is streamlined, modern and serene. The colors are restful, the lighting subdued. These private patient rooms resemble hotel rooms with private baths, mini refrigerators, and flat screen TVs. Even the business part of the room, the oxygen and suction hook ups, are behind a sliding panel to disguise them when they are not needed. The nurses do their jobs discreetly; competent but not in your face. The halls are carpeted and there is interesting artwork on the walls.
Kelly can't see the door from her bed as the room is L shaped. Every little noise causes her to wonder if someone is there for her or if it is just a passerby. She will surely be able to get a good nights rest tonight. She left most of the monitors behind in ICU. The frequency of monitoring her vitals has decreased significantly. The patient controlled pain pump is gone, replaced by pills taken every 4 hours. Soon the catheter will be gone and, with any luck, maybe they will take away the compression wraps on her legs (or maybe not). There is still a long road ahead, but this is definitely progress.
The physical therapist got Kelly on her feet today. She shuffled her way through ICU for a short, exhausting first attempt at walking. Kelly will need to get out of bed and walk at least 3 times a day with the promise that it will be easier each time she does it. But today, for the first attempt, it wasn't easy. I saw fear in Kelly's face when she started. I saw satisfaction when she finished. When you have had major surgery on two parts of your body at once you must take pleasure in the small victories. Shuffling to the nurses station, eating solid food, surviving another IV stick. Got to keep on moving.
Tomorrow will be a better day.
Tuesday, April 7, 2009
Looking Good
Hospital time is different than any time zone I have ever experienced. Twelve o'clock our time is definitely not the same as twelve o'clock hospital time. The promise of getting Kel out of bed at noon today never happened till about 4:3o. But they did get her up for about a half hour (our time) which surely felt like much more (like eons in hospital time).
Kelly's doctor also approved her transfer out of ICU late this afternoon. After waiting several hours to make that move we finally heard that there were no rooms available tonight and Kelly would have to remain in ICU until tomorrow. I guess it was just another hospital time warp swallowing up great chunks of time. Oh well.
The care in ICU has been exceptional though, with one on one nursing care. It won't be like that on the floor so we won't complain. However, sometimes that hospital time works the other way and things speed up unexpectedly. When Tom and I go in tomorrow we may find that Kelly has already been transfered. We'll keep you posted.
Kelly was a bit reluctant to let me photograph her, but I thought you might like to see how good she looks. Of course, it took 3 tries to get this photo. The first attempt captured a grimace, the second caught her eyes drooping as she nodded off (as she does so often). The third, and last photo captured a bit of a smile and her famous dimples. Looking good!
Medically, Kelly's doctor is pleased with her progress. We are all breathing a bit easier tonight. I am sure there will be even more progress tomorrow.
Thanks to those of you who have sent cards. Kelly has already received more than a dozen and a half cards from friends, family and lots of folks at Sun City Peachtree where Tom and I live. Each and every card is like a warm hug. It is like having little visits with each of you. I so appreciate your comments, too. I read them all to Kelly today. Thanks so much for thinking of us and reaching out. It means more than you know.
Until tomorrow....
A Patch of Blue
I am lounging in my robe though it is 10 AM on Tuesday morning. I am gazing out at a mostly cold, gray sky with a small bright patch of blue peeking out and smiling on me. That picture perfectly captures how I feel today.
We all needed to sleep in a bit this morning. We arrived home at nearly midnight last night. Mercedes, the kitty, needed lots of attention after being alone for about 19 hours yesterday. And we needed to talk; to review the day with all the drama and tension. We were exhausted, but we needed to embrace all the emotion one more time.
We finally got into the ICU to see a rather groggy Kelly about 9:30 last night. Eric's face just lit up as he playfully touseled her hair. He was rewarded with a weak little smile, barely showing Kelly's dimples. For all of us, it was as bright as the biggest grin on a jack-o-lantern. Despite the tubes and monitors and nearly constant nursing attention, she looked fantastic!
As those of you who know her might expect, Kelly wanted a complete accounting of our day, including conversations, messages and especially our meetings with her doctors. Oh, she wasn't so alert that she could converse much; but she has a self designed sign/body language that manages to ask questions and express opinions without using many words at all. We gave her a blow by blow that we will surely have to repeat again today as the drugs will keep her from retaining any of it. That's okay, we are happy to repeat ourselves.
Eric took the early shift today, heading for the hospital about 9. He called from the ICU to say that Kelly is in good spirits and doing well. She claims she didn't get much sleep last night. Her nurse feels that she had a good night.
There were about a dozen cards for Kelly in the mail this morning. Eric said she was opening them already. Knowing that so many people care enough to send cards always makes Kelly smile. Thanks to you, she has a bright patch of blue in her day, too.
The nurses told Eric the plan is to get Kelly out of bed about noon today. And they will see if she can eat anything. She was greedily sucking on ice chips last night and had to be cautioned to slow down lest she make herself nauseous. Getting up will be a difficult thing for Kel. Her surgeon told us that they took all the belly fat they could get, as well as a good chunk of skin. Therefore, Kelly's abdomen will be very, very tight (and flat, a nice side benefit). She won't be able to stand up straight for a couple of weeks as the skin gradually stretches and releases enough to allow more mobility. If all goes well, Kelly may be moved to a private room later today.
Tom and I will go to the hospital about lunch time so that Eric can come home for a bit. His intention is to stay overnight, at Kelly's request, and he will need the break during the afternoon and early evening. We will continue to visit in shifts so that everyone has the opportunity to stay well rested. There is talk of releasing Kelly on Friday if everything indicates she is ready then. For now, we are happy to let the professionals tend to all of Kelly's needs.
The next milestone we face is when Dr. Caterson examines the new breast tissue for signs of necrosis or failure of the tissue to live. Even though they have checked the pulse of the newly attached blood vessels every half hour throughout the night, Dr. Caterson's opinion is the one that matters most. Dr. C's rate of success is higher than the national standard, so we are very hopeful that there will be no disappointments or setbacks. We will post updates frequently so that you can follow right along.
Keep those cards and prayers coming!
We all needed to sleep in a bit this morning. We arrived home at nearly midnight last night. Mercedes, the kitty, needed lots of attention after being alone for about 19 hours yesterday. And we needed to talk; to review the day with all the drama and tension. We were exhausted, but we needed to embrace all the emotion one more time.
We finally got into the ICU to see a rather groggy Kelly about 9:30 last night. Eric's face just lit up as he playfully touseled her hair. He was rewarded with a weak little smile, barely showing Kelly's dimples. For all of us, it was as bright as the biggest grin on a jack-o-lantern. Despite the tubes and monitors and nearly constant nursing attention, she looked fantastic!
As those of you who know her might expect, Kelly wanted a complete accounting of our day, including conversations, messages and especially our meetings with her doctors. Oh, she wasn't so alert that she could converse much; but she has a self designed sign/body language that manages to ask questions and express opinions without using many words at all. We gave her a blow by blow that we will surely have to repeat again today as the drugs will keep her from retaining any of it. That's okay, we are happy to repeat ourselves.
Eric took the early shift today, heading for the hospital about 9. He called from the ICU to say that Kelly is in good spirits and doing well. She claims she didn't get much sleep last night. Her nurse feels that she had a good night.
There were about a dozen cards for Kelly in the mail this morning. Eric said she was opening them already. Knowing that so many people care enough to send cards always makes Kelly smile. Thanks to you, she has a bright patch of blue in her day, too.
The nurses told Eric the plan is to get Kelly out of bed about noon today. And they will see if she can eat anything. She was greedily sucking on ice chips last night and had to be cautioned to slow down lest she make herself nauseous. Getting up will be a difficult thing for Kel. Her surgeon told us that they took all the belly fat they could get, as well as a good chunk of skin. Therefore, Kelly's abdomen will be very, very tight (and flat, a nice side benefit). She won't be able to stand up straight for a couple of weeks as the skin gradually stretches and releases enough to allow more mobility. If all goes well, Kelly may be moved to a private room later today.
Tom and I will go to the hospital about lunch time so that Eric can come home for a bit. His intention is to stay overnight, at Kelly's request, and he will need the break during the afternoon and early evening. We will continue to visit in shifts so that everyone has the opportunity to stay well rested. There is talk of releasing Kelly on Friday if everything indicates she is ready then. For now, we are happy to let the professionals tend to all of Kelly's needs.
The next milestone we face is when Dr. Caterson examines the new breast tissue for signs of necrosis or failure of the tissue to live. Even though they have checked the pulse of the newly attached blood vessels every half hour throughout the night, Dr. Caterson's opinion is the one that matters most. Dr. C's rate of success is higher than the national standard, so we are very hopeful that there will be no disappointments or setbacks. We will post updates frequently so that you can follow right along.
Keep those cards and prayers coming!
Monday, April 6, 2009
Waking Up
8:25 PM. We just had the call from the O.R. that Kelly's surgery is (finally) complete! They are waking her slowly and the surgeon will stay with her another half hour before coming to give us all the details.
Eventually, Kelly will be moved to the ICU. We will remain at the hospital until we can see her awake.
Thanks to all who have prayed with us throughout this long, long day. I will post more tomorrow.
Eventually, Kelly will be moved to the ICU. We will remain at the hospital until we can see her awake.
Thanks to all who have prayed with us throughout this long, long day. I will post more tomorrow.
Still Waiting
It is after 6 PM. We have been expecting the plastic surgeon to come through the door with the news that the surgery has been successfully completed. No word at all since the 11:30 AM report from Dr. Christian. I have been pacing for the past half hour. I have reached my limit.
The O.R. finally called a moment ago. The good news is that Kelly is doing very well. Dr. Caterson is pursuing the DIEP reconstruction, which spares the most abdominal muscle and is the procedure Kelly wanted. The bad news is that the surgery will continue for another couple of hours. AAAARRRRRGGGGGHHHH!
Thank God that Tom and Eric are so steady. I have been extremely patient, but once I reach my limit it is easy for me to go off the deep end. I don't want to yell at anybody and I don't want to pace outside the O.R. doors. I also don't want to sit/walk/pace or kill any more time in any way, shape or form. Enough is enough.
Okay......I promise to get a grip and hold it in a little longer. After all, in the grand scheme of things we have the easiest part of the day.
Kelly seems well in hand, but I could sure use an extra prayer or two.
We will post again as soon as we have more information.
The O.R. finally called a moment ago. The good news is that Kelly is doing very well. Dr. Caterson is pursuing the DIEP reconstruction, which spares the most abdominal muscle and is the procedure Kelly wanted. The bad news is that the surgery will continue for another couple of hours. AAAARRRRRGGGGGHHHH!
Thank God that Tom and Eric are so steady. I have been extremely patient, but once I reach my limit it is easy for me to go off the deep end. I don't want to yell at anybody and I don't want to pace outside the O.R. doors. I also don't want to sit/walk/pace or kill any more time in any way, shape or form. Enough is enough.
Okay......I promise to get a grip and hold it in a little longer. After all, in the grand scheme of things we have the easiest part of the day.
Kelly seems well in hand, but I could sure use an extra prayer or two.
We will post again as soon as we have more information.
A Ray of Sunshine
Tom and I took a little walk around the hospital to stretch our legs and relieve our stress. Suddenly a man in a long white coat stopped and pointed at us. Turns out it was Dr. Christian who had just come from reporting to Eric that his part of the surgery, the mastectomy, went very smoothly. He graciously took the time to go over it all again for us, answering all my questions. One of the most important bits of information is that the sentinel lymph node biopsy was cancer free, indicating that the cancer had not spread to other parts of the body. I couldn't contain myself and gave him a big hug. He seemed pleased and told me he liked hugs. Me, too.
The plastic surgeon, Dr. Stephanie Caterson, was already underway with the long reconstruction process before Dr. Christian left the O.R. We still have hours to wait, but it is a huge relief to be over the first hump. Kelly made us promise to make notes of all information we received so that she can review it all later. Talk about not wanting to miss a single detail. She comes by it well, I suppose.
Seems that many of you are following the CaringBridge site closely for Eric's updates. For you, this is redundant. For those who are following my blog only, I am thrilled to pass along this little ray of sunshine.
Keep those prayers coming.
The plastic surgeon, Dr. Stephanie Caterson, was already underway with the long reconstruction process before Dr. Christian left the O.R. We still have hours to wait, but it is a huge relief to be over the first hump. Kelly made us promise to make notes of all information we received so that she can review it all later. Talk about not wanting to miss a single detail. She comes by it well, I suppose.
Seems that many of you are following the CaringBridge site closely for Eric's updates. For you, this is redundant. For those who are following my blog only, I am thrilled to pass along this little ray of sunshine.
Keep those prayers coming.
Waiting
It is about 10:45 on Monday, April 6. It has already been a long day as I have been up since 4:00 AM. We arrived at the hospital by 5:15 to begin the waiting we are destined to face today. We waited in admissions. We waited in Nuclear Med. We waited in the pre-op area. And now we wait in the Patient Liaison area.
We met Kelly's breast surgeon who is performing the mastectomy as I write this note. We met her plastic surgeon and the resident who will do the reconstruction surgery. We met the anesthesiologist and his assistant. And we met the nice lady who came to perform Reiki, a Japanese technique for stress reduction and relaxation that also promotes healing. (http://www.reiki.org/FAQ/WhatIsReiki.html ). It seems to be a good team of very caring people.
Kelly was calm and feeling secure when we left her. I, on the other hand, felt the need to give that knowing "mother's look" to each staff member in turn, indicating that they had best take good care of our daughter. It must have been evident because I had several pats on the shoulder and words of reassurance (and a box of kleenex).
When we transferred to the waiting room in the Family Liaison area, we were given a beeper. There are a team of people here whose job it is to make us comfortable and to be sure that we are kept up to date as regards to Kelly' progress. They will direct us to private phone lines for calls with the surgical staff as they have things to report. No word yet, as it is much too soon to expect anything. Be we will wait. We are in a comfy little nook with soft chairs, outlets for our computers and free beverages. There is a TV nearby. Today is opening day for the Boston Red Sox and the game will be played (if not rained out) just a few blocks away. For now, the TV will have to satisfy Eric, who is an avid fan.
If you check the CaringBridge site you can follow Eric's postings. He is a much more succinct writer so if you don't have the time to listen to my ramblings then that is the better site for you to check.
Till later.....
We met Kelly's breast surgeon who is performing the mastectomy as I write this note. We met her plastic surgeon and the resident who will do the reconstruction surgery. We met the anesthesiologist and his assistant. And we met the nice lady who came to perform Reiki, a Japanese technique for stress reduction and relaxation that also promotes healing. (http://www.reiki.org/FAQ/WhatIsReiki.html ). It seems to be a good team of very caring people.
Kelly was calm and feeling secure when we left her. I, on the other hand, felt the need to give that knowing "mother's look" to each staff member in turn, indicating that they had best take good care of our daughter. It must have been evident because I had several pats on the shoulder and words of reassurance (and a box of kleenex).
When we transferred to the waiting room in the Family Liaison area, we were given a beeper. There are a team of people here whose job it is to make us comfortable and to be sure that we are kept up to date as regards to Kelly' progress. They will direct us to private phone lines for calls with the surgical staff as they have things to report. No word yet, as it is much too soon to expect anything. Be we will wait. We are in a comfy little nook with soft chairs, outlets for our computers and free beverages. There is a TV nearby. Today is opening day for the Boston Red Sox and the game will be played (if not rained out) just a few blocks away. For now, the TV will have to satisfy Eric, who is an avid fan.
If you check the CaringBridge site you can follow Eric's postings. He is a much more succinct writer so if you don't have the time to listen to my ramblings then that is the better site for you to check.
Till later.....
Sunday, April 5, 2009
Life in the City
Sun! The sun is finally shining in Boston. The view from the wall of windows in our living room is incredible! Our apartment is on the seventh floor located at the point where Massachusetts Ave and Westland Ave intersect in the Back Bay area of Boston (for those who may be familiar with area).
Directly across from our window is Symphony Hall. Not the front of the building but, better yet, the stage door. There is always a lot of commotion outside, but late last evening our ears picked up the sound of laughter and applause. Seven stories down was Bernadette Peters graciously signing autographs and posing for pictures. She had just finished a performance that was obviously appreciated by her happy fans.
We were well prepared for zeroing in on the celebrity's bouncy red hair and smiling face. For some reason Tom had brought along a spotting scope and a tripod that he uses for bird watching. That and the binoculars that Kelly had packed really made us feel like we were right in the middle of the excitement. A little touch of Hollywood right in our own neighborhood.
The city is alive and active 24 hours a day. There are several schools located close by. The students don't seem to follow a clock, they are always on the street, even in the middle of the night. There are frequent sirens, whether police or amulances for the nearby hospitals. We smile down on the gridlock during rush hour and have been witness to a traffic accident. It is a vital place.
Our building is one of three adjoining buildings of apartments built over a string of shops on the street level. We have only to turn out the door of our lobby to find a coffee shop, a hardware store, a pharmacy, a Radio Shack and even a post office. Plus more that I have yet to explore. Across from the main entrance to the building is the Christian Science Church Plaza where the Mother Church is located. I must get out my camera and take a few pictures to share. Behind the Christian Science Plaza is the Prudential Center. On the southeast side of the Plaza is a long reflecting pool that has yet to be filled for the season. I am sure that will be a beautiful site and a tranquil spot in the middle of all the chaos. Directly behind our building there is a Whole Foods Market that will come in handy in a pinch. You know what they say: "Whole Paycheck Market".
Speaking of markets, Tom and Eric did the grocery shopping while we girls were out on Friday. They did find a "regular" grocery store to shop at. Regular except for the $18 they had to pay for parking in the store's parking garage. We spotted a Stop and Shop near the hospital so the plan is to stop in as needed and get what we can carry while leaving the car parked at the hospital. No wonder we see so many people on foot or bicycle!
Eric and I are the only one's up this early on a Sunday morning. He has gone off (on foot, of course) to find coffee and a paper. If the sun persists and the predicted rains stay away perhaps today will be a good day to do some exploring on foot. The traffic is light and the crowds are diminished. I understand there are some interesting shops along Newberry Street five blocks up. Might be worth a look-see.
We must be up and out very early tomorrow. Kelly has to check in at the hospital at 5:30 AM. Her surgery is scheduled for 7:30 and we are told she can be in the O.R. up to 10 hours. It will be a long, long day tomorrow so I am hoping it will be an early night tonight. Or it could be a very long night if Kelly can't sleep. Either way, surgery is about 24 hours away and counting down. I will take my laptop to the hospital, as will Eric. We will post news when we can, but don't be surprised if there is no news until late in the day.
Please keep those prayers and healing vibes coming. They are most appreciated.
Directly across from our window is Symphony Hall. Not the front of the building but, better yet, the stage door. There is always a lot of commotion outside, but late last evening our ears picked up the sound of laughter and applause. Seven stories down was Bernadette Peters graciously signing autographs and posing for pictures. She had just finished a performance that was obviously appreciated by her happy fans.
We were well prepared for zeroing in on the celebrity's bouncy red hair and smiling face. For some reason Tom had brought along a spotting scope and a tripod that he uses for bird watching. That and the binoculars that Kelly had packed really made us feel like we were right in the middle of the excitement. A little touch of Hollywood right in our own neighborhood.
The city is alive and active 24 hours a day. There are several schools located close by. The students don't seem to follow a clock, they are always on the street, even in the middle of the night. There are frequent sirens, whether police or amulances for the nearby hospitals. We smile down on the gridlock during rush hour and have been witness to a traffic accident. It is a vital place.
Our building is one of three adjoining buildings of apartments built over a string of shops on the street level. We have only to turn out the door of our lobby to find a coffee shop, a hardware store, a pharmacy, a Radio Shack and even a post office. Plus more that I have yet to explore. Across from the main entrance to the building is the Christian Science Church Plaza where the Mother Church is located. I must get out my camera and take a few pictures to share. Behind the Christian Science Plaza is the Prudential Center. On the southeast side of the Plaza is a long reflecting pool that has yet to be filled for the season. I am sure that will be a beautiful site and a tranquil spot in the middle of all the chaos. Directly behind our building there is a Whole Foods Market that will come in handy in a pinch. You know what they say: "Whole Paycheck Market".
Speaking of markets, Tom and Eric did the grocery shopping while we girls were out on Friday. They did find a "regular" grocery store to shop at. Regular except for the $18 they had to pay for parking in the store's parking garage. We spotted a Stop and Shop near the hospital so the plan is to stop in as needed and get what we can carry while leaving the car parked at the hospital. No wonder we see so many people on foot or bicycle!
Eric and I are the only one's up this early on a Sunday morning. He has gone off (on foot, of course) to find coffee and a paper. If the sun persists and the predicted rains stay away perhaps today will be a good day to do some exploring on foot. The traffic is light and the crowds are diminished. I understand there are some interesting shops along Newberry Street five blocks up. Might be worth a look-see.
We must be up and out very early tomorrow. Kelly has to check in at the hospital at 5:30 AM. Her surgery is scheduled for 7:30 and we are told she can be in the O.R. up to 10 hours. It will be a long, long day tomorrow so I am hoping it will be an early night tonight. Or it could be a very long night if Kelly can't sleep. Either way, surgery is about 24 hours away and counting down. I will take my laptop to the hospital, as will Eric. We will post news when we can, but don't be surprised if there is no news until late in the day.
Please keep those prayers and healing vibes coming. They are most appreciated.
Saturday, April 4, 2009
Hunkering Down
It is Saturday. Counting down that would be S minus 2 day, or two days until surgery. We aren't looking forward to Monday, April 6. On the other hand, it seems like the hours between now and then are deliberately going as slowly as possible. Most every encounter or conversation is dominated by questions and more questions, with a few explanations thrown in to keep things more interesting. Cards, calls, some flowers and a beautiful gardenia plant have been bright spots amidst the necessary preparations we face as a family.
This morning, Erica (who is a part of Kelly's on-line support group) came for a visit. She is a young physician (geriatrics), who lives and works nearby the apartment. She also has had breast cancer, and is still facing reconstruction surgery. Erica was very helpful by explaining, in detail, what Kelly can expect immediately following her surgery. Some of it was alarming, but at least now it won't be a surprise. All-in-all, it was a valuable visit in terms of gathering information.
It is women like Erica, who have already been where Kelly is going, that are the most comfort for all of us. Many of my friends (you know who you are) have shared personal stories too. There is a special bond among survivors and a willingness to open their hearts, to share their experiences in an effort to make it easier for others who must face dealing with breast cancer. A heartfelt thanks to all of you for sharing.
We went to Brigham and Women's Hospital today for a "dry run". Kelly wanted to familiarize us with the hospital location and the various strategic points inside. We now know where the coffee shop, gift shop and waiting rooms are located. We know where admitting, the O.R. and nuclear medicine is. We know how and where to use valet parking. This was all reassuring, but I found the most comfort in the fact that Kelly and Eric both seemed comfortable with the physical surroundings. It is hard enough to face surgery, but to be walking into strange, unfamiliar surroundings could be an unsettling start. I am grateful for those small comforts.
The rest of our day was rather quiet. Kelly calls it "hunkering down" meaning a time of inward focus to prepare for the stressful days ahead. She has some meditations and visualizations that she will rely on to calm her spirit. She is conscious of keeping herself hydrated and is trying to eat lightly. She has packed her bag and organized her necessities. Her bath chair has had some modifications to work in this particular bath. Her special "granny launcher" electric recliner is positioned and ready to offer a comfortable place to rest when getting in and out of bed is just too hard.
Kelly is keeping busy trying to get some thank you notes taken care of, loading her i-pod with tunes and her new Kindle (a birthday gift from Eric and his mom, Polly) with books for needed diversion. She has been intensely involved with school for so long that the idea of listening to music or reading a book just for pure pleasure seems almost out of reach. But there will be time to fill when there is little else she can do for entertainment. This is good planning and keeps her mind off all those "medical details" that aren't so pleasant.
Tomorrow will be another day of hunkering down. Quieter yet, more introspective, I am sure. We will definitely spend some time re-reading all the well wishes that have been sent our way and know that we are truly blessed to have so many people out there holding us close in their hearts. Thanks for being there.
This morning, Erica (who is a part of Kelly's on-line support group) came for a visit. She is a young physician (geriatrics), who lives and works nearby the apartment. She also has had breast cancer, and is still facing reconstruction surgery. Erica was very helpful by explaining, in detail, what Kelly can expect immediately following her surgery. Some of it was alarming, but at least now it won't be a surprise. All-in-all, it was a valuable visit in terms of gathering information.
It is women like Erica, who have already been where Kelly is going, that are the most comfort for all of us. Many of my friends (you know who you are) have shared personal stories too. There is a special bond among survivors and a willingness to open their hearts, to share their experiences in an effort to make it easier for others who must face dealing with breast cancer. A heartfelt thanks to all of you for sharing.
We went to Brigham and Women's Hospital today for a "dry run". Kelly wanted to familiarize us with the hospital location and the various strategic points inside. We now know where the coffee shop, gift shop and waiting rooms are located. We know where admitting, the O.R. and nuclear medicine is. We know how and where to use valet parking. This was all reassuring, but I found the most comfort in the fact that Kelly and Eric both seemed comfortable with the physical surroundings. It is hard enough to face surgery, but to be walking into strange, unfamiliar surroundings could be an unsettling start. I am grateful for those small comforts.
The rest of our day was rather quiet. Kelly calls it "hunkering down" meaning a time of inward focus to prepare for the stressful days ahead. She has some meditations and visualizations that she will rely on to calm her spirit. She is conscious of keeping herself hydrated and is trying to eat lightly. She has packed her bag and organized her necessities. Her bath chair has had some modifications to work in this particular bath. Her special "granny launcher" electric recliner is positioned and ready to offer a comfortable place to rest when getting in and out of bed is just too hard.
Kelly is keeping busy trying to get some thank you notes taken care of, loading her i-pod with tunes and her new Kindle (a birthday gift from Eric and his mom, Polly) with books for needed diversion. She has been intensely involved with school for so long that the idea of listening to music or reading a book just for pure pleasure seems almost out of reach. But there will be time to fill when there is little else she can do for entertainment. This is good planning and keeps her mind off all those "medical details" that aren't so pleasant.
Tomorrow will be another day of hunkering down. Quieter yet, more introspective, I am sure. We will definitely spend some time re-reading all the well wishes that have been sent our way and know that we are truly blessed to have so many people out there holding us close in their hearts. Thanks for being there.
Friday, April 3, 2009
Settling In
I should have posted this last night, but yesterday was a long day and I was just pooped.
We arrived safely at our apartment in the heart of Boston late yesterday afternoon. We arrived to find that Kelly and Eric had done a pretty good job of settling in already since they had arrived about 24 hours before. By Sunday, we should be fully stocked and feeling more at home. We have to be.......Monday is going to start a new chapter.
Today is Kelly's birthday. Her friend, Rebecca, has arranged a girl's day out complete with lunch and a trip to the spa. Later we will go to Eric's brother's for a family dinner. Kelly is also looking forward to visiting with Cowboy, their Australian shephard pup, who his staying with Neil, Kathy and their two boys.
I will write more when things settle down a bit. By Monday you will be hearing from me regularly. Until then, I am off, soaking in the experiences and percolating the ideas of things to share.
Stay tuned.
We arrived safely at our apartment in the heart of Boston late yesterday afternoon. We arrived to find that Kelly and Eric had done a pretty good job of settling in already since they had arrived about 24 hours before. By Sunday, we should be fully stocked and feeling more at home. We have to be.......Monday is going to start a new chapter.
Today is Kelly's birthday. Her friend, Rebecca, has arranged a girl's day out complete with lunch and a trip to the spa. Later we will go to Eric's brother's for a family dinner. Kelly is also looking forward to visiting with Cowboy, their Australian shephard pup, who his staying with Neil, Kathy and their two boys.
I will write more when things settle down a bit. By Monday you will be hearing from me regularly. Until then, I am off, soaking in the experiences and percolating the ideas of things to share.
Stay tuned.
Monday, March 30, 2009
Address Correction
Just a quick note to tell you that the address in Boston is slightly different than what I posted early this morning.
The correct address is Church Park Apartments
255 Massachusetts Avenue
Apartment 702
Boston, MA 02115
The direct phone line is 617.236.5890. We will all have our cell phones.
Sorry.
The correct address is Church Park Apartments
255 Massachusetts Avenue
Apartment 702
Boston, MA 02115
The direct phone line is 617.236.5890. We will all have our cell phones.
Sorry.
Tick Tock
It's almost 5 AM here. Can't sleep. Lot's of lists and piles of "stuff" as we prepare to leave for Boston on Tuesday morning. Our car will be packed to the brim with the necessities and comfort items to ease our time away from home. I have the smoothie maker packed, at Kelly's request, some PoppyCock popcorn for Eric, a variety of teas and my favorite oversized mug, a stack of books for Tom and work supplies so I can keep up my "Patient Outreach" job for Erin. Oh, don't forget the birthday presents for Olivia (she'll be 8 on April 18) and Sam (he's 4 and just needs presents).
Kelly and Eric have found a 2 br/2 ba apartment in the Back Bay area of Boston. We will right in the heart of downtown and within walking distance of everything we could possibly need. The most important factor is proximity to the hospital and we can even walk there if the weather is pleasant enough. The apartment will be fully furnished, right down to a vacuum cleaner, like a corporate rental.
Our address, for the month of April, will be :
Church Park Apartments
255 Massachusetts Avenue
Apartment 702
Boston, MA 02115
Kelly's surgery is scheduled for very early on Monday, April 6th. The O.R. has been booked for 10 hours, so it will be a very long day for all of us. Eric will be posting updates to the CaringBridge site, so you can check there for details. There is a link to that site on the left side of my blog, or you can go directly to www.caringbridge/visit/kellywalborn.
If you would like to send Kelly a card I know she would appreciate it. Looking forward to the mail everyday could be a bright spot for her.
Thanks to everyone who has offered hugs, well wishes and prayers for our family. Your support means a great deal to all of us.
Please note that I have added a box (to the left) where you can subscribe to Posts. I am not sure exactly how it works, but I was able to add a link to my blog (and latest posts) on my Yahoo home page by selecting "My Yahoo". If subscribing doesn't work for you then you will just have to bookmark this page and check back at your convenience.
Thanks for listening.
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